7 June 2004

Where to begin? Today was fabulous. There are no assumptions, just talking and teaching.  There is judgment neither from the horse nor you.  I like and appreciate that you started me from the very beginning; how to walk to a horse in pasture, That very thing allowed me to let go of all my previous knowledge and start fresh.  This is a new beginning, a whole new intent with a whole new path and outcome.

Shilo and Pete were wonderful, so there and ready.  They taught me so much just in a single day.  They truly are mirrors, every insecurity, hesitation and screw up affected them and as soon as I saw that, if I didn’t already know, I knew then that I had projected that.  Which made the synchronicity just oh so spectacular.  And they were just as pleased as I was!!!

The possibilities of this understanding and awareness are endless.  What a gift they bring.  We, apparently, are conduits for them and Spirit.  What a great job we have.  Not only did I learn today that I can do this, that I have the potential, but also that no matter what has happened in our lives, no matter how hard it has been, we don’t have to live it every day.  Everyday is new, and though we are a culmination of our experiences, they don’t rule us.  Pete is a perfect example.  When you find someone that understands, your whole world changes.  Live in the present, because it can always change.  Live life pure, with respect and goodness and it will be returned.  They are a constant reminder (horses, that is).

[Colorado Immersion Program]

8 June 2004

Yesterday I witnessed the unfolding blossom of self-direction, self-confidence and trust in a young colt.  Good Boy was originally thrust into a relationship with the human equestrian experience with such force, impatience and ego that it not only caused physical damage, but emotional as well.  Its apparent Good Boy comes from a place of goodness, wanting to please, do well and trusting, but a moderate layer of fear and mistrust now blankets this.

What I saw yesterday was a second chance for the horse.  One based in trust, respect and patience.  Sensing this, it didn’t take long for Good Boy to trust and believe in Franklin to protect and lead him well.  With a quiet, elegant confidence, Franklin moved Good Boy through the process of introducing him to the elements of a solid human/horse relationship and all it entails.  Good Boy was able to overcome his skepticism and fear of the saddle at his own pace and learn what was expected of him within this newly figured relationship.  It was an extremely beautiful show of give and take between human and horse.  Good Boy learned that it is ok to not only be himself, but to be the best he can be under the guidance and tutelage of Franklin.  Trusting Franklin instilled confidence in the young horse and soon his fear of the unknown and distrust became moot and Franklin rode atop a proud and relaxed horse.

It was an impressive experience, one that brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart.  It was all so simple and thoughtful.  Seemingly, they both walked away from the experience with a deep connection to one another, a sense of pride and accomplishment, as well as a quiet, but strong sense of joy for life and all the possibilities held within.

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9 June 2004

Today I got a glimpse inside of horse.  I saw its true self/spirit and I saw its psyche.  I am beyond floored.  I have been at pure joy and love, to a place of surprising connection, to overwhelmingly intense sadness to amazement and probably a bit of shell shock.

Both horses have been abused; the kind of abuse that continues over time.  They are now in a safe place, and it is time to heal.  My god what I saw was intense.  It almost feels to big to write about.  But, I don’t want to lose a bit of it, not for myself or out of reverence for each horse.  They shared their souls today.  I know how hard and scary that is, therefore I have a deeply sacred respect for what they did, the journey they are embarking on and allowing me to witness a part of it.  As well, I saw yet another aspect of Franklin’s work.  He is not only a teacher and leader for the horse, but a healer.  His understanding, empathy and guidance today were as deeply connected to the Spirit, healing and sacred as the journey the horses are on.

I’ll begin my processing with the horses.  Each one has a story, just like we do.  Some have superficial scars, some hidden.  Unless totally free and wild, or being with the right person, horses seem to get through life trying to figure out what the hell it is we are wanting.  And, in the process, get hurt.  They administer layers of protection against any further pain by bringing forth “bad behavior”.  They learn to protect themselves at any and all costs and learn not to trust.  Sound familiar?  This can be a thin veneer or a deeply rooted, multi-layered fear.  In either case, it can enshroud them.  Yet, their essence is one of the purest, most simplistic energies.  It is of love, goodness, honesty and companionship.  This essence is as deep as any layer of fear, so it is in constant conflict.  The horse cannot begin to live its fullest, or have any sense of serenity with this monstrous weight bearing on its soul.  The horse can survive, but not fully live.

While Franklin worked with these souls, I saw the battle within begin.  On a day to day basis, any animal can submerge their turmoil, but today, Franklin began pulling the scabs, forcing open the locked doors of protection and guiding their release.  The individual wars that ensued varied in degree.  Though neither was of lesser or greater value.  These horses wanted so badly to release their fears.  Their true essences were heaving and reaching for the surface and their fears were holding tightly to keep their footing.  As with anything, when intent is of a pure essence, it triumphs.  Each horse had its moment of triumph.  For one horse, it was a palpable moment.  For the second horse, the triumphant releases, the moments of overcoming parts of the fear, were just as huge, but were so occluded with fear, that if you weren’t paying attention or if you were blinded with your own fear, it would have been missed.  Even so, it was a hugely successful and triumphant day for them both.  It is a beginning for each.  They both have the strength and essence to see them through to peace.  They also have Franklin.

What Franklin did today may seem like most of his days with horses.  A successful one, of course, but in essence, its just what he does.  It is a part of his essence.  Now, granted, he is well aware of what happened- I saw him rejoice in their releases.  Anyway, what he did today was an act of true healing.  It was one so incredibly and solidly guided by Spirit.  His focus was so intent, his love, peace and compassion was so thorough that with each moment of fear for the horse, its essence knew it was ok to begin overcoming.  Franklin opened the door and held out his hand to guide the horse’ true self out and onto the surface.  He was protection and reassurance.  He kept the first horses’ outer self-occupied with exercise, all the while coaxing out its fear.  He allowed the horses’ outer consciousness to busy itself while his subconscious faced down and processed out the fear.  And, BOOM!!!!  I think it took the horses’ outer consciousness by surprised when that first big blob of fear popped out and away.  Such a battle for the horse, such love and guidance by Franklin.

For the second horse, Franklin first showed that he wouldn’t push any unnecessary limits with the horse.  Then, he literally played protector.  He placed himself between the horse and its fear.  He kept the object of fear at bay from the horse, beat the fear into submission (all the while, the horse was fearfully peaking around Franklin at the object of fear) and then re-introduced the object to the horse.  Through this display, the horse haltingly accepted Franklin as protector and leader, so when he placed the fearful wand and bag close to the horse, its essence understood and began to fight its way to the surface.  In bursts and fits, it began to crack the façade of fear.  Franklin not only supported this horse energetically and physically, but verbally as well.  He gave both empowerment and encouragement to the horse by telling him to “Stay your ground.  Stay your ground.”  And, the horse did its absolute best to.  It was unbelievable.  Again, it is a beginning.  An incredibly beautiful and sacred experience.

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10 June 2004

It not only impresses me, but also inspires me to have found a philosophy, a ‘Way’ that covers all realms of being, all aspects of life and all species across the board. This Way of teaching ‘horse’ is also the way to teach ourselves. There are slight modifications, slight tweaks, so to speak, depending on individual personality and behavior. Yet, young or old, horse or human, it takes peace, quiet, confidence and light to heal and make change.

This way of being can and should encompass all aspects of life. It takes away blame, anger, resentment, judgment, fear and failure, replacing it with acceptance, encouragement, empowerment, companionship and love. It allows us to stand where we are and begin a new way of being. There is no need to “come to terms with….”, or understand where we’ve been, what we’ve done or has been done to us (whether horse or human), we just begin. This new self awareness and nonjudgmental view of ourselves and others allows us to see what is and how to improve upon. It expands our modes of communication by emanating from the heart instead of the head. In order to have a successful relationship with horses, we must first strip away the negative beliefs and fears that we have carried for so long and become clear. What do we have to lose?

For the first time, I truly understand what many religions and spiritualities are trying to convey. Words hinder the true essence of it, but through connecting with something that is true and unhindered (the earth, nature, animals, the Creator) we can see that by abolishing self-imposed restrictions such as fear, we are left with light, love, peace and acceptance, and so, we grow and are truly free.

[return to top   |   Colorado Immersion Program]

11 June 2004

The first step of my journey has been taken. Wow, what a step! This past week has opened so many doors. I feel cleansed, lighter and clearer. I have learned so much about myself and horses. It is amazing how similar we are. We are a looking for understanding, companionship, honesty, respect and trust.

My time with Franklin and the horses taught insight, quietness and connection within myself and the horses. I learned to quiet my mind and heart and truly listen. We, as humans, get so caught up in and rely heavily upon words to express our thoughts, desires and feelings. Yet, if ready, the horse can help to bring us back to center and remember how to express with our hearts and bodies. Communication is a multi-leveled action. By learning to clear ourselves and listen with all of our senses, we are able to hear and interact with all of creation. It is a wonderful gift that we often ignore and sometimes forget. To practice this remembrance and to pull it fully to the front again, the ground work with horses is essential. It gives us time to connect with the horse and reconnect with ourselves before the journey begins. It is a moment to stretch our muscles and to quiet and focus our minds and hearts as well. It is a time to confront any issues, clear them and begin; it creates and strengthens the connection between us and the horse. It is ‘right action’ and a way of being that I resonate strongly with. I will use this with myself and all that I come into contact with for the rest of my time.